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YOU are the one controls your perspective

Every experience in life that you have, and how it makes you feel, is a direct result of your perspective on life.

Let this sink in for a second, in fact, re-read that line, and stare at the ceiling thinking about it for 30 seconds.

Every experience you have and how it makes you feel is a direct result of your perspective on life.

YOU are the one who controls your perspective. No one else can change that. Unless you let them. No advice given on this forum will help you, unless you let it. Unless you absorb it. If you see something that doesn't sound right to you from your perspective, you're going to reject it. Right? Sounds like real life, right? If someone gives you advice that makes sense to you from your current perspective, you might absorb it and change a little. Yes?

What I'm saying is, advice isn't going to help you. But changing your perspective on life, will. And you're the only one who can do that, not us. Think deeper.

For example, let's say you were single. Let's say you'd been single for a year or so, and the girlfriend factor just isn't there. And you go to a bar hoping to meet some cool new girl, and hopefully take her home. You get to the bar, you talk to some new girl, she turns out awesome, but then isn't too interested in you, doesn't give you her number. You come home sad.

Let's look at the events here, with the emotions thrown out:

Was single
Went to bar
Talked to cool chick
Came home alone
But now, let's say you go to the bar with intentions of having some beers and just kickin' it. Listening to some music, talking to some friends, throwing some darts. You go in, you have some drinks, you meet a cool chick, she's fun to talk to, you think she's awesome, you say you should hang out sometime, she turns you down and goes home. You hang with your friends some more, go home alone, no crying. What just happened?

You were single
Went to a bar
Talked to a cool chick
Came home alone
But this time, not sad. Why? Your perspective on how your night was gonna go did not involve some chick being interested in you when you set out. Your self-validation did not hinge on that aspect, and even though the end result was the same, you come home significantly happier.

What you need to do is find a point of view such that however your life is going, it's seen from a perspective that your life is all right. You will not be able to convince yourself, with your current perspective, that your life is fine.

This is a subtle point I'm trying to get across, because it seems like you're already sitting there convincing yourself, "My life is good...! I have a job! My girlfriend's pretty damn cool!" But it seems like you're... well, doing just that. Convincing yourself. Or more accurately, squeezing these observations through the lens of your current perspective, and trying to make them fit so that they make you happy. This won't work! It will feel forced! You need to change your reasoning and your values. You need to realize that some of these things aren't as important as the weight you are giving them. You may need to relax. You may need to let go of life.

I recommend finding a park and laying out in the grass and staring at the clouds for one hour, once a week. Ask yourself, "What is really important in life?" Making a living so you can eat, yes. Having a woman? No. That's a bad perspective because it means you are basing your happiness in something that someone else has to give you. The only person you can rely on to make you happy is yourself, and it is done by creating a new perspective lens to see the world, through which everything you observe feels calm, happy, or peaceful.

What about being happy about having good grades, basing your value off your academic performance? Still, bad. People get burnt out, people slip. You can't pressure yourself all the time to be perfect. Because when that doesn't happen, your perspective that was causing your happiness to hinge on it, breaks. All you really need out of life is to eat and sleep and have a roof over your head, that's all that's absolutely necessary. And it's relatively easy to achieve, at least for anyone here. Obviously you're doing well enough to afford a way to connect with us through the internet, so you can afford to eat I hope. 

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