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Three keys to doing street approaches

Once you've gotten yourself into a good state of mind you will be ready to do some warm up exercises. The best warm up exercises are simple. It can be as simple as saying something (anything) to the first person you see as you walk out of your door ("good morning/afternoon", "what time is it", ask for directions, say Hi or Hello and smile, do a quick opinion opener, high 5 them, etc.) If you repeat this several times then you will get warmed up really fast. This technique is great for getting shy people into a more conversational and outgoing state.

It is best to practice all of these techniques to get into the right state for approaching women. If you do, you will notice a big improvement in your results.

Rule #2 - Develop Precise Body Language Communication

If your body language is weak when you open a woman walking towards you on the street she will oftentimes just continue walking. I believe this is one of the biggest problems guys have when doing street approaches. Contrary to what some people think, women don't do this to be rude or because they are bitchy but because they have a life. They have things to do and there is not enough time in the day for them to stop and talk to everyone that wants to talk to them.

So, opening in a powerful way is critical. The three components to doing this are:

1) Using the right energy levels

2) good timing

3) the right kind of body language that will stop them in their tracks but not make them feel threatened.

A few months ago I was in a mall with my wingman and he was opening sets. He approached about 5 sets of people and couldn't get them to stop and talk. He said it was probably because the people in this mall were not friendly or it was too late in the day and people just wanted to get home. So, I did a little experiment. I used the same opener he was using and did it about 3 times in a row and all 3 went really well. The only difference that I was able to notice was that I was using the right amount of energy to open them, I was opening them at the right time and I was clearly communicating to them (through body language) that I was intent on talking to them (in a friendly way).

Communicating powerfully with body language is all about calibration. This starts before you even begin the approach and it only takes a fraction of a second. All you need to do is calibrate how much energy is needed to effectively open her. If it is a loud or fast moving environment then you need to use a lot of energy (speak louder and be more animated). If it is a quieter, slow moving environment then you need to use a lot less energy (speak softly and be less animated). If the woman you are stopping is walking really fast then you will need to use more energy, speak louder and be more animated. If you use too much energy you will weird them out and she will want to leave. If you use too little energy she will not want to continue talking with you because by doing so she would have to drop her energy level down. Ideally, you want to go in with just a little more energy than they have. This will take some practice.

Timing is also important. If you wait until she is right beside you then you've waited too long. A lot of times she will just keep walking and it will be infinitely more difficult for you to stop her once she has walked past you. It can be done - but why make things difficult. If she is walking fast you will need to stop her sooner than if she is walking more slowly. It will take some time to learn the right timing.

Lastly, strong confident body language that communicates that you are committed to talking with them is very important. This can be communicated very easily by taking a small step in front of them (not blocking their path but rather stepping into it slightly) and putting your hand out in front of you at about waist level with the palm facing down and pointing in their direction. If you step too much in front of them you will scare them and they will feel threatened. Don't do this. If your hand is too high you run the risk of making them feel a little threatened as well.


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