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A Checklist of things NOT to do
Taught a few hundred guys by now just from meeting guys through PAIR and in workshops recently, and this is the shit that ups their game instantly with no tactics or anything. I see this shit ALL THE TIME. It's the BIGGEST and most COMMON problem I see after everyone I've met. This is some of the main shit I focus on fixing when I'm in the field.
Almost EVERYONE I met so far screws up this shit, and it totally fucks up their sarges.
If you do this, don't feel bad. 99% of guys I meet do it to various extents (myself included).
This is the extension of the "10 alpha qualities" post, which was when I was first figuring out what this shit meant. Back then, I was just posting observations. This post contains conclusions, having now thought about it.
ERADICATE this shit, and your game will go up B-I-G-T-I-M-E, more than ANY tactics will help you. This is part of what's called being a "natural". Even with nothing else, if you know this stuff you'll do well socially, and probably get laid. This stuff is the KEY.
This stuff is only for people who play the REAL game, not the INTERNET ARMCHAIR GAME. So guys who don't actually PLAY can skip this, because there's not much theory in it - its directly applicable.
1) FIDGETY MOVEMENTS AND TIGHT SHOULDERS AND TAKING YOURSELF TOO SERIOUSLY OR BEING TOO BUSINESSLIKE OR "SOPHISTICATED" (not laughing or being relaxed) = very visible subconsious (or conscious) self-doubt, overcompensating through non-relaxed state, where you're prepared to deal with anything that could happen. Ever met someone who doesn't blink when you talk to them?
2) TALKING TOO FAST = worried that people will stop listening to you unless you get out something that will interest them before they leave
3) LAUGHING AT YOUR OWN JOKES = covering up that you aren't affected that others didn't laugh, and social nervousness
4) SAYING "RIGHT" OR "YOU KNOW" AFTER STATEMENTS = seeking validation that what you said was true, or saying it because others aren't
5) STANDING WITH LEGS NOT HALF A METER APART AT LEAST = worried that you'll infringe on other people's personal space
6) TALKING TOO SOFTLY OR LOUD = fear that you'll impose yourself on people and their personal space(ie: beta).. alpha males aren't afraid to project their voice.. YET, talking obviously too LOUD can also be seen as OVERCOMPENSATING. Just like guys who wear GENERIC clothes are trying to fit in, or guys who wear OUTRAGEOUS clothes are trying too hard to overcompensate. (hint: be careful with peacocking, find a style that doesn't come off this way, which can be tricky but is still very doable).. Some guys don't talk, some talk too much, etc etc.. Find appropriate balance through trial and error, which is determined through social observation,
7) MOVING YOUR HANDS AROUND WHILE YOU TALK = trying to keep the attention of the group (sometimes can be cool, but most often a form of qualifying yourself)
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